Bhojpuri actor Pawan Singh has taken sexual harassment to new heights when he inappropriately touched and sexually harassed his co-actor on the stage, with all the lights and cameras capturing that act!
Pawan Singh has shown Indian men that to sexually harass a woman in India, you need not have any fear. The video shows the male actor and his co-actor, the female, standing side-by-side on a stage as they were speaking to their audience. There were cameras capturing live videos and there were lights focusing on the two. Despite all this, despite being in front of a large crowd watching them, despite knowing that the event was being filmed, Pawan Singh couldn’t resist the urge to inappropriately touch the woman.
According to the NCRB data, between 2014 and 2022, a total of 299,520 cases of rape were reported across the 28 states and 8 UTs in India. There are 19 dowry-related deaths a day. Indian women are not safe with their husbands and in-laws. A man in Delhi raped his own mother. In the country where a woman is considered worthy of respect only when she becomes a mother. Indian women are not safe with their own family. There is a video of a man in public transport in Mumbai masturbating, sitting next to a woman. There is a video of an old man in Kerala blatantly staring at a woman sitting beside him on a bus, staring at the woman’s chest. Sexual harassment and men masturbating to women in public places are not uncommon; Indian women are not safe in public places. Indian women are not free from sexual assault and rape even in prisons, where you would expect them to feel safe, right under the noses of the guards 24/7!
Even on social media platforms, men publicly make rape jokes and justify rapists and blame the victims. Because of fear of judgement, shame, and further harassment, most women do not openly talk about or report being harassed by an abuser. In a culture where people see a woman as nothing more than an object, where a woman’s reputation depends on whether she is a virgin before she gets married, how “modest” she is, how far from “evil eyes” she remains (because it is not the fault of the sexual predator but the victim), and how obedient and submissive she remains all her life, women are forced to keep their personal tragic stories private.
Any regular comments section on any social media platform would show what unites all Indian men irrespective of religious differences, demographics, class, caste and language: the toxic masculine urge to control women.
What do men like Pawan Singh tell the young boys of India? In a country where women already feel unsafe, in a country where sexual harassment and rape and femicide only make it to the news to occasionally stir the pot or as a tokenist gesture because they are so normalised, in a country where movies in all different languages show that a man can win any woman he desires, no matter how old he is or how he looks, men like Pawan Singh only make it worse. This deliberate act of disrespect by this man reveals not just his shamelessness, his immorality, his unprofessional behaviour, his disregard for boundaries, and his desire to exploit, but also that innate sense of confidence that nothing could possibly go wrong with harassing a woman because the public, the media, and the law enforcement department will forgive it all.
What do men like Pawan Singh tell the young boys of India? In a country where women already feel unsafe, in a country where sexual harassment and rape and femicide only make it to the news to occasionally stir the pot or as a tokenist gesture because they are so normalised.
Not just one more act of inappropriate touch but a loud message to the men and women of India: this is not just an act of harassment against one woman but a public declaration of disrespect towards all women of the country. Through this outrageous gesture, Pawan Singh speaks for for those men who are abusers, assaulters, and rapists and those men who are just a few steps away from crossing the line, publicly sharing his message that consent does not matter; that a man can do anything, anywhere, to any woman he desires, and the only thing that should matter is whether he desires to misbehave with her and how much he desires her.
This way, young boys watching this will remember for years to come that the bar for men in any kind of heterosexual relationship is extremely low, that as long as they do not rape a woman in public, they can do anything else, and the public and the law will let it go, reinforcing the idea that it is the fault of the woman if she gets harassed.
Inappropriate behaviour is not to be judged by the intention of the assaulter or abuser or rapist. The victim had recalled Pawan telling her that something was stuck on her waist, and she thought it might be the tag of her blouse, as her saree was new. It was a sticker? A sticker, which may or may not have been there, prompted Pawan Singh to molest a woman publicly and make her uncomfortable? This clearly shows that Pawan Singh and his like know very well what is disrespectful and inappropriate. It is not a matter of ignorance. They just know when and where and with whom (with women and children) they can misbehave and with whom they can’t (with fellow men, especially men who are more powerful than they are!).
Pawan Singh did publicly apologise, but again, we all know that it was not a sincere apology, so there is really no point. To sincerely regret one’s actions, one must have a sense of morality, but that is not something that sexual harassers have. Also, even in the namesake apology which he offered, just to save his face, Pawan Singh has said that he feels very bad if she had felt bad about being harassed. No, he did not say that he feels ashamed for not valuing consent, not respecting professional boundaries, and not respecting his co-star as a woman or as a fellow human being, or for touching a woman inappropriately. He is not even acknowledging his vulgar act, so when he doesn’t even repent for how shameful that action of his was, how could that apology be sincere?
Through this outrageous gesture, Pawan Singh speaks for for those men who are abusers, assaulters, and rapists and those men who are just a few steps away from crossing the line, publicly sharing his message that consent does not matter; that a man can do anything.
Pawan Singh was not just another abuser, a pervert on stage, and yet another symbol of toxic masculinity. What motivated him to behave the way he did? The confidence that he can get away with any degree of indecency and he does not have to pay a huge price. While the victim quit because she felt humiliated, like most other molesters in the Indian media industry, Pawan Singh also had to pretend to be a humble, religious, god-fearing Indian man who respects women (because it’s women who are child-bearing machines, and how will their legacy continue if women refuse to birth children?). The same old “I am sorry if you felt bad; I did not know that you were a human being with feelings and worthy of respect” story.
The only thing an abuser like him fears is the loss of their reputation, their “decent man” masks falling off in front of the public, especially in front of their families, juniors, and their loved ones. We need stricter laws and stricter actions. If a man misbehaves on a flight, he should face consequences for that. If an actor or a professional in the media industry misbehaves with a fellow professional, that must be the end of his career in the industry. If a man misbehaves in an educational institute or setting with a student or fellow professional, his degrees and qualifications to teach must be withdrawn.
If a law enforcement officer misbehaves, he must no longer be allowed to work in the department in any role across the country. All these reforms can help reduce the number of harassment, rape, and femicide cases because the abusers seem to have no fear of the law otherwise? But what we do know is that when it comes to women’s safety, no political party or politician in the country seems to take it seriously. On paper, we women have voting rights, access to education, and employment opportunities, but is India really a country for women? The endless misogyny says no. And the Bhojpuri actor Pawan Singh is just another reminder of this dark reality.
Lakshmi Prakash is a psychotherapist and writer that loves behavioural sciences and everything out of syllabus. Annoying her is easy: tell her to conform. Befriending her is easy: crack silly jokes (the sillier your joke, the louder her laugh). She can be found on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.