Ira Khan, daughter of Bollywood superstar Aamir Khan, has once again spoken candidly about her body image struggles, recalling a phase when she believed she was “fat.” She revealed that the negative self-perception spiralled into the early signs of an eating disorder, leaving her afraid to eat.
Ira shared that it was during this difficult period that her father stepped in and took her to Germany for a fasting retreat to help her recover.
Ira makes a confession
Ira on Monday took to Instagram to share a video to talk about the complex relationship she has had with her body. She posted the video with the caption that read, “What I looked like when I thought I was ‘fat’/’unfit’. And the moment I understood what it felt like to be in a… fight, almost, with your body, weight and sustenance. It’s one of the worst feelings I’ve ever felt.”
In the video, Ira, who has been open about her mental health struggles, shared that she avoided looking at herself in the mirror while growing up, which is why she never really registered whether she was overweight or unfit.
“I grew up never looking in the mirror because I thought it was vain, so even when I brushed my teeth or when I was in a lift, I would never look in the mirror. I would sneak glances and then look away even when no one was watching. What this means is that I didn’t really know what I looked like, and so in the beginning when I thought I was fat, I would say fat. I meant unfit. I actually didn’t know what I looked like,” Ira shared.
She continued, “In 2017, I got a slipped disc and I think I kept re-injuring it because of being silly up until 2019. Towards the end of 2019 is when I started to feel unfit and in my head I started to think I’m fat because to me unfit and fat were the same thing. Here are pictures of when I thought I was fat”.
Ira on developing food disorder
In the clip, Ira confessed that she used to cry in the gym while shifting between workouts. There was a moment when she stopped going to the gym and started playing football.
“It kept getting worse, and before I knew it, I had put on 30 kgs. At the end of 2020, I was at a place where I didn’t want to eat anything unless my mum had said I could eat it or a doctor had said I could eat it. Even if it was home food, I would feel bad about eating it. And through the year I remember times where I would order a lot of ice cream and a lot of dessert and eat the whole thing and then feel really sick afterwards,” she confessed.
Ira shared that she remembers waking up on certain days and really “wanting to starve” herself.
“Fortunately I caught it and I was like, ‘no, you are not going to develop an eating disorder’. So, I would make sure that I didn’t starve myself but I really wanted to. I would feel really horrible, and very scared to eat. At some point towards the end of 2020, I really freaked out and I was really struggling,” Ira said.
When Aamir took Ira to Germany
That’s when her father and actor Aamir Khan took charge of things and took her to Germany. “We went to Germany for a fasting retreat. We spent 17 days there. I fasted for 17 days in a completely controlled environment with doctors and making sure it was safe. Apart from the fasting, we had free rein to do whatever we wanted…. They would take us on a walk and there were 3 levels. There was the fast group, the medium group, and then the old people group,” she said.
And Ira wanted to walk with the old people group because she felt extremely “unfit”, but was asked to join the middle people group.
“I remember crying and at every step, I felt like I didn’t know how to take the next step… My dad was standing next to me and holding my hand. He was trying to say ‘we just take one step at a time’. But I remember looking down and thinking how helpless I felt,” she said.
Ira shared that between 2020 and 2026 there were “3 times where I was fat and obese”. “I finally checked my weight last year in June and I found out that I was 84 kgs. And that really shook me because the last time I checked, I was 57…To anyone who struggles with their weight, whether it’s putting on weight or losing weight, I believe you. It is very painful and very hard if you feel like your body’s not listening to you… It’s one of the most terrible feelings I’ve ever felt,” she said while wrapping up the video.
Ira has previously spoken about her long battle with clinical depression, including the guilt she felt for struggling despite coming from a privileged background.